Tag-Archive for » Friends «

The Virtual and the Real World

Tuesday, February 01st, 2011 | Author: Vivek

You might have noticed from my earlier blog post that I have started to reduce my usage of Facebook beginning with ‘February w/o Facebook.’ I have noticed that Facebook is increasingly merging with the real world. And this is the very reason I have decided to quit it, because it is neither completely REAL nor completely VIRTUAL.

There’s a saying, that states a person wears a variety masks in their life, that of a friend, a lover, a superior, an enemy, etc. But see the thing with masks is that you can only wear one at a time. Facebook does not allow you the opportunity to change personas, meaning that when you add, your school-friends, your co-workers, and your family members as friends you have to realize one thing, all of those groups of people view you in specific light. But when you get on your friend’s page talking about how you did some dash with some dash, then it’s a problem because one of your family members or co-workers can view that comment. All of a sudden they’ve lost respect for you or believe you are irresponsible.

Thinking about posting picture of you flaunting how good your life is now, so that your ex will see and wish they never let you go or maybe just because you need an ego boost and is looking forward to all the superficial comments you’ll receive, well think again. The top 5 new pictures you post will be listed in your recent activity log and will be the first thing people see when they go to your page. Why is this a bad thing? You are just being narcissist and just doing all this to boost your ego.

The truth of the matter is that every person, no matter who they are, changes their behavior depending on their environment. It’s not being two-face or phony, it’s simply adapting. There is no universal personality for you to display. Facebook is a social network that allows you to openly contradict the images that you display in different aspects of your life. People are three dimensional beings and should not be confined to a one dimensional social-networking nightmare.

Facebook is a great website that can help you connect with old and current friends. However, One important thing to remember about Facebook is that while you call everyone you connect with a “Facebook Friend,” the relationships all have varying degrees of closeness in real life. In fact, Facebook ‘Friend’, itself is a misnomer.

“Facebook Friends” means just that: you’re friends on Facebook. You can view each others’ profiles and tag each other in pictures. But people you call “friends” on Facebook are not all people with whom you are close. They might be your best friend from Kindergarten, someone you met in a party at friend’s friend’s place, or anything in between. Facebook communication is a good way to keep in touch with people whom you would otherwise not see again, but that doesn’t mean your relationship goes anywhere beyond casual acquaintances.

Facebook can damage relationships when people assume a higher level of friendship than actually exists. This goes two ways. First, you should not assume that reading your friends’ status updates, playing Farm Town with them, or writing a few notes on their walls means you are maintaining your friendship. That requires actually socializing, spending time together, chatting on the phone or in person – not just superficial contact on the Internet.

Conversely, some people get upset when they are defriended on Facebook, as if it was a real relationship/friendship that has broken up. In truth, there are many reasons for defriending someone on Facebook, from being actually upset with them to simply realizing that you don’t communicate much, or that you don’t want to share parts of your private life with someone whom you don’t know well.

Smilarly, people might not invite you (or even if they invite, it could be just a superficial invitation) to their parties or other events through Facebook for the same reason: you are just an acquaintance or person whom they want to keep in touch with, but not friends. This is a distinction that people easily accept in real life, but calling everyone on Facebook your “friend” seems to blur the lines.

Facebook lays on the edge between the Internet and real life. It allows people to connect with others they know in real life, making those relationships a step above “Internet friend,” someone you may have never met in real life. However, it neither makes casual acquaintances into something more nor maintains close relationships without any real-life effort. When people assume that it does, Facebook can damage their real-life relationships.

Orkut vs Facebook

Sunday, February 22nd, 2009 | Author: Vivek

Orkut and Facebook are two of the most popular social networking sites, with both offering very similar features and capabilities.

I do have access to both an Orkut and Facebook account and find myself using Orkut the majority of the time. I am exploring Facebook only now. Right now, I actually prefer Orkut when comparing Facebook vs Orkut from a usability perspective. Here’s what i think.

>I like Orkut, because i got used to it. The ease with which you can work in Orkut is really cool but Facebook is qite complicated. I remember when i started using Orkut in 2006, i never had any issue. I joined Orkut on my friend’s recommendation that it was quite useful for him to find old friends. And, It actually helped me find my childhood buddies too.

>Navigation in Facebook is quite confusing. Whereas, Orkut is very intuitive.

>In Facebook, It is difficult to search for friends, as you can only see the profile photo before adding as a friend. But, they have “Discover People you might know”.

>Facebook gives unnecessary updates, which are trivial as to who wrote on whose wall… which quite frankly, becomes annoying after a while.

>Orkut gives you much easier personalization, where you can choose which friends you want to see updates on, birthday reminders, photos, etc. Though, i would like to control parts of my profile, scrapbook and communities too, like that.

>Orkut has themes, Facebook doesnt.

>I feel the communities in Orkut are quite useful and many use it to their advantage. But, Orkut can do something to restrict people whom you do not know, to see what are all the communities you are part of. It sometimes affects your privacy.

>Facebook has lots of ads. Orkut too has started adding advertisements, but i feel its in a designated slot, so doesnt affect the users much.

>It depends on the Country. Here in US people havent even heard about Orkut. Whereas in India, Orkut is quite popular.

>Finally, it comes to where you have more friends and in which Social Networking Site your friends are active. So you go to the site in which he/she is active in and check for their updates. Isnt it?!

So, Which one do you prefer? ;)

Making New Friends

Tuesday, February 10th, 2009 | Author: Vivek

How easy is it for you to make New Friends? Might seem like a silly question, but for some people it is so easy. They hit it off as friends straight away. And for others, it takes time. I fall into the second category (at least, most of the times). I do like making new friends but i am kind of slow in making friends.

Why am i like this? This perhaps may be because of the influence of my Destiny Number Seven on my Gemini-ite character. Sounds confusing?!! Well… Let us first see what my Zodiac Sign and Destiny Number say about friendship…

Gemini and Friendship:

The social butterfly of the Zodiac has lots of friends. In fact, the Twins should have twice as many as any other Sign. Gemini make very interesting and exciting friends. They like to leave their mark on everyone they meet. Life is very interesting and fun with a Gemini friend. If you need any advice, Gemini is the one to ask. They are masters of communication and they can help you get what you need by helping you with persuasion and enthusiasm, and they give good advice too. A Gemini friend can fill you in with the latest gossip and if you love conversation, the Gemini delivers! Gemini is the friend to seek when you want to learn something new, need more information or want to talk of your mutual interests. June 12 people have a genuine love of people and value diversity in their circle of pals. The Gemini loves to talk about the latest thing he is doing.  They seem to know a little something of everything.(Yea!) They are very generous with their friends, they will spend lots of time with you and share everything with you. Often Gemini friends have busy social lives which can leave you hanging or puzzled as you wait for their attention to return to you. Even though Gemini is a social butterfly, they always need time for themselves and that should be respected.

One side of a Gemini will want to go hang-gliding and run around outside, while the other is happy to sit at home playing a board game. (Very True!) Their friends need to be as diverse as they are in order to keep up, or they just need to know when to let Gemini go free. The Twins can bond well with lots of different groups. If they get bored with one set of people, they always have a few more groups that will be more interesting – for a while. (True Again! I am part of every gang in the class. And so, I get to go out with all the groups, which otherwise is not possible, if i belonged to just one group. So, i don’t miss out on the fun. But, at times, i also feel like i belong to no group, and am all alone.) If you can match their pace and mercurial temperament, you and your gemini friend will have endless fun. The best way to develop a bond with a Gemini is to make an intellectual connection. Interested in exploring anything at all? Take along your Gemini pal and enjoy the new perspective they give to even the most ordinary situations. If you can match wits with this one, they’ll respect your intellect and work to develop this worthwhile friendship.

Destiny Number/Life Path Number 7 and Friendship:

A Life Path Seven person is a peaceful and affectionate soul. (I Guess.) But you guard your connection to people carefully. You are a highly perceptive person who understands human nature. When you meet someone, you are not often fooled by their outer personality, but seem to scan their inner motives at once. You have a natural talent to analyze deception and to recognize people having insincere attitude. (Yea. Sometimes.) You aren’t one to have a wide circle of friends, but once you accept someone as a friend, it’s for life. (That is True.) Most predominantly, people with Life Path number 7 are not characterized as a social person all the time. The reserved attitude may be misinterpreted as aloofness and many find it takes some time to even get up the nerve to approach them. (It is me who finds it difficult to approach new people.) Actually, it’s not that at all, but merely a cover up for your basic feeling of insecurity. You dislike crowds, noise and confusion. You prefer solitude. (Yes, sometimes!)

Secretly, you may feel jealous of the easy relationships formed by others; you may perceive others as less inhibited than you, or more free to express themselves. You may harshly criticize yourself for not being more gregarious. (Yes!) They have a wall up around them due to their ability to see insincerity and deception in the motives of others. Once they get to know someone well and can see that they are worthy, the wall will lower and a lifetime friendship will be established. It’s as if you must get to know someone a lot better before you allow the wall surrounding you to be penetrated. After they have gotten used to a situation, they will come out of their shell more. (Yes, Again!) But they will never intentionally seek out a group of strangers and join in. Chances are you are a very charming and refined individual with great poise and a quick wit. Nonetheless, there is an exclusiveness about you.

So… Is this all true? Yes… True, To Some Extent. I am a little bit of Both… Gemini and Seven. Maybe, this all part of the Gemini Duality!!

Till this point of my Life, I’ve always felt intimidated by new people. This means that I won’t talk a lot when placed in a new environment with new faces. Most people might read this as arrogant and stuck-up, but in reality, it’s just because I’m afraid to say things around people I don’t know. And also because of a bad quality of the Gemini-ites (Short Attention Span), i hardly notice people around me. Geminis never rest their eyes on one object for more than a few seconds. In fact, their alert, quick-moving eyes are often the easiest way to recognize them.

How about you? Feel free to leave some facts about yourself below! And if you know me, do say wat you think about me, it will help me understand myself better and overcome my shortcomings.

A Surprise Reunion

Monday, December 29th, 2008 | Author: Vivek

Yesterday i met my college friends. I had planned to meet Kanthimathinathan, Hari and Senthil at the Anna Nagar Tower Park, my favorite Hangout Place in Anna Nagar. Especially Good for Chatting with Friends! And then later to meet Srini and Surendar at their place. Being a Punctual Guy ;) I went there first… On time! and then Kanthi joined me soon. We then went to the Ticket Counter to get the tickets to go up the Tower. Being the Holiday season, there was a Huge!!! Crowd, i’ve never seen a crowd there before. Uff, yeh population growth! Then Hari joined us while we were trying to get into the crowd and get tickets. We three went up the Tower. Soon the time passed and a security person came and sent everyone down. We came down and started talking and walking around the park. We were going around the lake when two guys suddenly pounced upon me shouting my name! The entire place being very dark, I was shocked, wondering who the hell were these guys now?! They were Vinoth Kumar, Raja with Srinivas and Surendar. That was quite a surprise. I didnt expect that i would find them all there. Then after sometime Senthil arrived as planned.

This was quite a surprise reunion. Better than the planned reunions which always proves to be quite a dud most of the times. Discussing abt what all of us and the rest of our class guys were doing and stuff. We froze the moment on Camera. Then all of us had a Soup that we usually have at the Tower Park during our walks. Then Srini, Surendar and Raja, Vinoth took leave. Myself, Kanthi, Hari and Senthil went to the Hills Green restaurant near Anna Nagar Roundtana for dinner before going home.

It was a Delight meeting all my friends today. Spending time with old friends is something so memorable you will never find it anywhere else in life… no matter who you meet. All of us will soon go our own separate ways in life. It may be many days or months before i meet some of the Guys again. I guess reality and that whole “growing up” thing we’re supposed to do has finally hit me. Har Gadi Badal Rahi hai Roop Zindagi!

My First Paycheck

Thursday, August 07th, 2008 | Author: Vivek

For everyone who works, one significant day of their life is the day of the first salary. I got mine on 31st of July 2008! :) I am not going to disclose how much it is (Company Guidelines :P ) but it was a great moment for me. The whole of the money, my own money, much awaited money. I was expecting to get my first salary from Infosys, but Sutherland beat them to it!

Our salary account was with ICICI Bank. All of us were eagerly awaiting our first salary. We were told that we’ll get the money only by 6pm on the 31st! We were working at that time and so we cudnt go to the ATM! But, we got the message thro’ the Mobile Banking service that the salary has been credited!

I don’t have to ask money from my parents anymore cause now I have my own money. HaHa. Soo Hooray! Money! $_$ Yes. I Luv Money! (Well, Who doesnt?!)

But, I havent decided how to spend it yet! Any suggestions?! ;)

Update: I invested my entire Salary in an Equity Fund! :)

My First Road Trip!

Sunday, May 18th, 2008 | Author: Vivek

This Trip to Mahabalipuram with ma frnds in Bike, was my first Road Trip out of City!

I had not informed my Parents abt the Plans, but eventually my mom found out abt it later!

It was during our Second Year in College… When we were sitting in the Workshop and chatting(as always), someone came up with this idea of Bunking College and going somewhere on a one day road trip in our bikes. We actually planned to go to Tada Falls… Initially, when we planned it in college, nearly 20-30 guys frm ma class agreed. But, after going back home, the guys started giving various reasons for not coming, one by one. The count went on decreasing. So, it was as good as cancelled!

The Next Morning i woke up to Tune of my N-Gage QD Ringing! It was my frnd Raja over the phone, who told me his new plans(Mahabalipuram)! I told him i’ll call him back after ascertaining the situation at my place. I had to check whether the atmosphere is conducive for Bunking or not! Thankfully, we had guests at home that day and mom was quite busy with them. So, after some time i informed ma frnds that i would be coming. And then, i got ready as usual and left home at around 7am.

Srinivas and Myself stayed in the Same Apartments. So, i went to the ground and waited for him. All the other guys were to come to our Apartments. We were 6 in all. Srinivas and Me. Naren and Hem Kumar. Raja and Senthil Kumar. So, we started from our Apartments which was in Anna Nagar and went via Maduavoyal to the By-Pass(200ft) Road. This 200ft Road was almost empty and we zoomed away to GST Road in No time. As the saying goes, Journey is more important than the destination. We enjoyed the Travelling part, which was the most exciting. Coming back to the journey, We took a left turn near Crescent Engineering College and went on till the end of that road. We were a bit hungry by then and had some snacks and water at a nearby Bakery Shop. Then, we went on to Mahabalipuram. On the way we had to pay at some Toll Gate in OMR. I paid for the three of us and kept the tickets in my pocket and forgot about it!!! On our way, Raja tried doing some stunts. He was so busy showing off that he drove over a fresh cowdung and it splashed all over his pant! And there were a lot of funny moments that day.

At Mahabalipuram, we parked our Bikes and walked to the beach! The beach was nearly empty as it was very hot! We roamed around the place. Climbed the Rocks. Caught some crabs. Played in the Water

It was almost 2pm by then. We took our bikes and started back home. Before leaving Mahabalipuram, we finished our lunch at a roadside dhabba. While returning we took the ECR route. Again while coming back we raced each other.

I enjoy driving fast, but thats only when i am in the Driver’s Seat!!! :D

Hmmm… When we were almost near Muttukadu, Naren’s Bike’s Engine got heated up and it stopped. So, we towed his bike along with us to the Muttukadu Boat House and parked our vehicles there. We had to wait till his bike gets naturally cooled down. We went to the Boat house and lazed around at that place. After some time, we were back on track and reached home in the evening.

I didnt say anything at home and was back doing things as i always do after going back home from college.

I went back to Routine and forgot about that incident. But, i had a surprise waiting for me! After a few days, my mom asked me how was the Mahabalipuram Trip? I was really surprised, how she got to know the place and all?! I asked ‘What Mahabalipuram?’ Like if i didnt know anything. But, am not that good at telling lies, and after some time i let it out, said sorry and asked her how she found that out?! Then, my brother showed me the Toll Gate Ticket! It was clearly written in the Ticket as “Mahabalipuram”! I forgot about the tickets entirely, and my mom found those papers while washing my pants.

Well, my mom didnt say anything, coz am back home safe and sound(the reason she wud not let me out, is reg my safety), and maybe also that what has happened has happened. My folks are not that strict. But still, i didnt tell them because, my mom is usually afraid of the speed at which i drive and if i had told them i would be going to Mahabalipuram she would definitely not have let me go, then!

Anyways, it was a wonderful trip that day. The Bike Journey was the most exciting maybe coz it was my first time! It also taught me a lesson in life(which is the Moral of the Story). You gotta experience anything to understand it! And i learnt from my experience that day! Innime, alert ah irupom la! lolz

Moral of the Story:

It’s Only Wrong if You Get Caught!

Thappu Senja Thadayam Illaama Seiyanum!